The Gift of Silence

Suddenly two men dressed in white garments stood beside them. They said, “Men of Galilee, why are you standing there looking at the sky?…” We are never told of the immediate reaction of the apostles.

I suspect it was one of those moments of silence which quickly became a bit uncomfortable and perhaps awkward.  Maybe they looked around at each other, waiting to see who would say something or move. Maybe all eyes turned to Peter who was desperately trying to think of something to do or say.

Finally someone cannot endure the silence, “So guys, what do you think we should do?” “I don’t know, what do you think?”  “Maybe we should go back to Galilee”  “I think we are supposed to go back to Jerusalem”   “Jerusalem? And do what?”  “Wait.”  “For what?”  “For the power of the Holy Spirit.”  “I don’t know…..”   And then there is another period of silence…until someone finally begins to move off towards Jerusalem and the grand silence.  The days between the Ascension and Pentecost when they are without the presence of Christ among them. 

I do not think it would be too much of a stretch to imagine one of the disciples saying in joy, “He is risen, alleluia…,”  only to have the following alleluia kinda’ fall off into a question mark, not of doubt, but of what’s next. One of them plaintively offers: “Jesus was always there to lead, to teach, to show…. And now we have silence and waiting.”

Silence and waiting are definitely an acquired taste.

When I was a child in the days between the end of school and Christmas, silence and waiting were definitely not part of my skill set.

Years ago when I was first working in the commercial sector, my company sent me to a sales training seminar. I did not want to go, but it was actually quite helpful. I learned the skill of asking a question and waiting in the silence while the person hems, haws, processes, or ponders the question. If you want to be truly helpful to the prospective client, you need to hear what they have to say.  

Plato taught that often precedes insight. Søren Kierkegaard held that silence was necessary to develop authentic individuality. Simone Weil saw silence as a form of attention and spiritual receptivity. For her, silence allows one to truly attend to the presence of God, the needs of others, or the reality of suffering without rushing to fill the space. Across time, great thinkers have held silence in great esteem.

I find the same patient waiting in silence to be a valuable skill for hearing Confessions, talking with couples in marriage preparation, grief counseling, and a whole host of other pastoral settings. It is indispensable in preparing homilies.  I can’t tell you how often I have sat in silence, waiting for an idea. …And I find it invaluable in my life of prayer.

“Men of Galilee, why are you standing there looking at the sky?…

Perhaps the apostles should have said, “Hold your horses, I am looking at the sky, because I am taking this all in.” Maybe in the silence and the waiting, they realized that for the first time: “…in the Ascension, humanity has entered Heaven.  Jesus, true God and true man, now sits at the right hand of the Father. In the Ascension, we have been shown our destiny.  We have been shown the desire and hope of the Father in heaven, that all people will come to their inheritance, to their home.”

Maybe their thoughts continued “And Jesus just spent three years teaching and showing, caring and loving, and more. I can’t resurrect anyone, but I can lift people up. I can help them ascend in this lifetime to be ready when the power of the Spirit comes to them. I need to sit with all this a while and figure it out….”

And maybe they needed more time and silence to begin to contemplate the implications of the Ascension. “We are called to be witnesses to the end of the earth. We have to wait for the power of the Spirit to come upon us.” 

The “Spirit of wisdom and revelation” as it says in the second reading. The wisdom and revelation that need to be pondered and considered, and to sit with , so that … “May the eyes of your hearts be enlightened, that you may know what is the hope that belongs to his call, what are the riches of glory in his inheritance among the holy ones” (Eph 1)

Silence can be awkward or welcomed. But I would offer that the wisdom and revelation of God is best served in the silence and the waiting.  We don’t have enough of it in our lives. So, be it life or angels, don’t let anyone rush you past the silence and the waiting.

“Men of Galilee, why are you standing there looking at the sky?…

Because from time to time, we are supposed to – it is a gift of God.

Find some time this week to enjoy the gift.

Amen

Memory

Memory is an interesting thing.  I always secretly chuckle when someone asks me, “Father, do you remember your homily from five weeks ago?”  I generally respond, “What did you find interesting about it?”  as an alternative to the simple, “No.”  

There are many theories around the topic of memory apart from where the memory is associated with specific events, a general occurrence, personal experience, and more. Whatever the memory, we have to “register” the memory, store it and then recall it.  A recent study proposed there is a six-stage neuro-chemical process that has to occur for a memory to be retained long-term. Want an example. Consider dreams. Why can we remember some dreams in vivid and exacting detail, but other dreams just seem to dissolve into nothingness. Memory is a mysterious thing.

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In just a few words

There was a website called “twenty-twowords.”  The original idea was an on-going challenge of expressing yourself on some topic in 22 words or less. There were different categories, like “my life so far” or “which Star Wars character are you and why.” You have to answer each one with only 22 words. One of my favorites, in the category of “describe your greatest experience,” was, “I am in a hospital. A nurse hands me a screaming baby and I sat there, looking down, and said, ‘Hello son.”

Today’s gospel carries a message of the greatest challenge. Jesus’ response runs 33 words in English, but the effect is the same. For in these 33 words he leaves his disciples and us with as clear a summary of the Christian life as one could possibly want.: “love one another. As I have loved you, so you also should love one another. This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.

In his book Surprised By Joy, CS Lewis describes being at a very proper English tea, standing there with an overly filled cup, when, quite by accident, someone bumped into him, causing the jostled cup to spill some of its content out.  Later, when reflecting on that most ordinary of things, he noted that life is that a lot like that.  If we want to know that with which we have filled our life, we only need to be jostled by life to see what spills out. Would that I could tell you that every bump in the road reveals an outpouring of love from the teacup of my life.

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The still small voice

“My sheep hear my voice; I know them, and they follow me. (John 10:27)

In many ways the stories of the Bible highlight people hearing God call their names and they respond by following. Noah heard his name called, built an ark, and saved lives. Abraham and Sarah heard their names called, traveled to a land not their own, and became our parents in faith. Moses heard his name and set his people free. The prophet Samuel heard his name called and responded, “Here I am Lord. Your servant is listening.” Hosea, Isaiah, Ezekiel, Jeremiah and all the prophets heard their names called and followed.

Mary the mother of Jesus heard her name and said, “Yes.”

Peter, James, John and Andrew heard their names called and followed, leaving boats and nets behind.

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What kind of leader do we want?

Certainly a good question with the papal conclave scheduled to start in four days. I have lived during the pontificates of seven popes and in my lifetime we have certainly had a wide variety of types and styles of leaders. In our history, we have had 266 popes. We have had some spectacularly amazing leaders, saints in the making, and we have had some spectacularly horrific leaders, who would have been quite at home in Game of Thrones (so I hear, I actually haven’t seen it…).  All took up the Keys of Peter, with the same job description given Peter: feed my sheep; tend my lambs. The Pope is the most visible of leaders in the Church, but not the only ones with that same job description. The simple mandate, “feed my sheep; tend my lambs” applies to priests, pastors, parents, principals, police, and anyone who would lead – anyone who would answer the call to minister in the Holy Name of Jesus.

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Doors

There are all kinds of doors in life.  

Doors that lead to new life.  We pass through them and life is changed.  Passing through the doors of high school graduation to the new world called college.  Entering a common life through the doors of marriage – or vows as a Franciscan friar.  What was the most significant/memorable door you have passed through into a new life? I bet almost everyone’s passing was accompanied by trepidation, uncertainty – maybe a tinge of fear – and yet we commit and we pass through to new life.

Not so with all doors.  There are doors that lock us out.  

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A Story in Three Acts

It seems to me that if we have been attentive and following all the events of Holy Week, it is possible to discern a play written in three acts. The curtain rises with a prelude: an intimate act of Mary anointing Jesus’ feet. An act rich in meaning and done in love. Then begins Act 1. It is a scene worthy of a large screen. Palm Sunday as the disciples and believers welcome Jesus into Jerusalem, the royal city, the long-awaited Messiah King.

Act 1 continues with a quiet scene, away from the bustling crowds of Passover, with a last meal with his closest friends and disciples. It is then, at the most sacred table fellowship of the Jewish faith, that Jesus shows the disciples the meaning of the proto-Eucharist just celebrated. On bended knee Jesus washes the feet of his disciples. It was an embodied parable of what it means to be a Eucharistic people: love and service. As the curtain falls on Act 1 and when we consider the meaning of Act 1, it is clear, it is love portrayed.

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Betwixt and Between

I have to admit that Palm Sunday of the Lord’s Passion leaves me feeling betwixt-and-between. In the flow of the Lenten readings it seems like there is the building wave of love and goodness and so filled with the presence of God. On the 2nd Sunday of Lent we shared the story of the Transfiguration

On the 3rd Sunday there was the owner of the orchard that wanted to cut down the fig tree that had not borne fruit in three seasons. But the gardener interceded, asking for time, promising to give special care and attention in hope that the fig tree would bear fruit. Lent is like that special time given to us, letting us know the divine gardener watches over us: the presence of God.

On the 4th Sunday was the story of the Prodigal Son. I love the image of the father always on the lookout for us, praying we would return home from our misadventures. Even before we can explain or apologize, we are embraced, welcomed home, and know we are deeply loved: the presence of God.

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The Rearview

Part of life is often seen in the rearview mirror. Repentance and conversion need the rearview mirror – to see what has been and to begin to think what is possible. Lots of things can be seen in that mirror – memories good and bad, wisdom, information about the choices we’ve made, … and regret. 

Two Sundays ago, we heard the parable of the barren fruit tree. We can all look into the rearview mirror of our lives and recognize barren periods. We may regret the loss of opportunity, the wasted efforts….and more. While the vineyard owner wanted to lay the axe to the tree and make room for a tree that will bear fruit, the gardener wants one more year.  A year for change, a year for repentance.  When we look into that rearview mirror of life, we can see our barren periods and regret, but in that same moment do we also see the continuing patience of God with us who had not yet given evidence of the fruit of repentance, of conversion? Can we see past regret to the hand of mercy upon us?

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Hope for Us All

“A man had two sons …” (Luke 15:11) – such is the beginning of the beloved and well-known Parable of the Prodigal Son. But you know Scripture doesn’t come with titles for such things. That’s just what the parable has always been called. But we could call it something else. The Parable of the Waiting Father? Or perhaps the Parable of the Petulant Older Brother? I guess it all depends on what draws your interest and attention. What about you? Where are your thoughts drawn: to the younger son’s selfish greed, the older son’s arrogant fury, or perhaps the patient father’s extravagant love?

The younger son is a distant figure for me. I hope I have little in common with him – in the beginning he is impulsive, cavalier, inappropriately demanding, disrespectful and more. At first blush, I have nothing in common. At least I hope not. I have never run away, squandered gifts given to me, or led a life “a life of dissipation” as it says in scripture. Looking for some synonyms for “dissipation?” You can try, “debauchery, overindulgence, degeneracy, intemperance” at worst, but at best, we are still left with “reckless” and “unthinking.” But neither have I felt the ardent, tear-soaked embrace of a loving father welcoming me home – but then I never left. And so, I have never encountered the wild, unfettered love of reconciliation.

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